I have not been able to post here and on Woman’s Mojo Risings for a very long time and have had to be content with posting to Facebook. There is a lesson in my experience of not being able to post. I could not get the domains connected to my sites, as I changed where I purchased the domains and the guidelines were not as good as the company I had used in previous years. I knew it was a simple case of find the code here and put it in there, neither here or there could be located.
The big problem was my mindset, that for it to count as something I achieved I had to every aspect myself. This was malarkey. The whole process on both sites took a skilled professional less than 5 minutes and I had let 1 site be in active since 2013 and the other a couple seasons rolled by, because I consider throwing in the towel an act of failing and proof of not being good enough to run a website I actually built. Now I see, failing to respond to a technical difficulty by asking for help, was stubborn and self- sabotage. So over the next few weeks I will be knocking the dust off them and seeing what I can bring to the table. I really love blogging and I am looking forward to the whole process of raising the titanic that was Woman’s Mojo Risings and my start on line years ago.
To update I have been moved into what was my mother’s home of 20 years for several months. Now it completely feels like my home and I am completely happy with my choice to keep and occupy it. It is so peacefully easy here, especially financially, I have 2 bills, lot rent and an $89 level pay on electric, because everything else is included in the lot rent. It is 900 sq foot and I am thrilled with having downsized, thrilled with a small yard and good neighbors I have known as my mother’s friends for years.
I am so looking forward to producing my first oil painting here, the last of my supplies should arrive soon from Dick Blick. And I am very excited. Over the years I have been doing digital art and know I will probably incorporate all that I learned from that into what I do now. The years have proved that even daily life experiences expand and advance ones art even when you are not actively able to make art. So I am excited but have absolutely no idea what I will come up with as a result of so much influence and hours of combing images and techniques. And I have never painted in an environment so safe and quiet or from a point of such contentment and happiness.
I am, of course still finding my way, but I have learned so much from my mother and her gift to me, that I feel guided. There were so many things that she did that I did not understand and in fact quit a few set off my OCD, because it looked like disorder to me. Now I know she had a different form of order by which she set her home. She went with convenience and steps saved. I did not get it, because I am very much a home for everything and everything in it’s place and she was one of everything where ever she spent considerable time through out the day. It was not till I was trying to set up what worked for me that I finally got what she was doing and when I did get it, I got I had her support and blessing to make it work for me, just as she had made it work for her.
And some of the things that worked for her, I found work very well for me, like clothes pins are awesome bag clips. The old icing can is a great sugar bowl and it feels good to hang a load of delicates on the shower rod to air dry the rest of the way. It is as she said, really silly to keep buying zip lock bags when they wash up just fine! She left me a perfect blueprint of living as your authentic self, living as a woman on your own.
The first time I got sick here was a totally delicious experience, because she stock piled every comfort one could need to pamper themselves through it. Boxes of Kleenex, cough drops, Vicks Vapor rub, heating pad, ice bag, mentholated muscle creams, nose sprays, humidifier and air purifier, all kinds of hot drinks and soft throws to curl up in. I have never felt quite as spoiled and realized I never had any of that stuff and what a difference it makes to see to your own comforts and take good loving care of yourself. She had many interests and she did not stop making the time for them. She continued to photograph in spite of a shake in her hand and to learn digital and printers and to write creatively. I found snippets of poetry and short stories that were done in recent years tucked away everywhere.
So all in all, life is good and I am so excited to let it change me. I found joy in re-purposing her things and mine, because I have come to appreciate the skill she had at and that it is okay to do so. Whatever works, what ever functions well as and makes you happy! One of the things I realized that made it difficult for her was trying to set up a craft room and an office in the 2 smaller bedrooms. It left her no place to actually work on the things she loved…too crowded to spread out your materials. So where I am at on that is rather than maintaining the traditional kitchen living room for company, I think what I will have is a kitchenette and couch in my studio.